Mother’s Day. The day we honor our Moms and all they have done for us. The day we appreciate their sacrifices, their love, and their caring hearts. And a day where many of you are being honored in your spectacular role in motherhood. A blessed day and a cherished day for so many.
Mother’s Day is quite the opposite for me. It is possibly the most challenging day of the year for my otherwise strong, turned fragile heart. It isn’t a celebration (Even though I celebrate my Mom and other amazing Moms that I know and love.) It is a reminder of my shortcomings and my never-meant-to-be’s. My failures. My missed opportunities.
You see, Mother’s Day is not the same festive occasion for all of us. When all you’ve ever wanted was to have children of your own, but that wasn’t in God’s plan. When you remember the long and painful road of infertility. When you are a step-mom to grown boys who can’t begin to understand the challenges you faced trying to make their lives better, only to have your efforts go unacknowledged and your love sometimes unreturned. When you are not the real Mom. When you are not a Mom at all.
Today opens a wound for me that is otherwise covered by a big fat bandaid. A vibrant and colorful bandaid, but a bandaid nonetheless. Other days I can be fine and not miss what I always wanted. Other days I can celebrate my other amazing blessings in life and not get stuck in the things I never had. But today, not-so-much. That bandaid is ripped off, leaving the sting in my heart and the scar fully exposed.
I am sharing this, not as a sob story for you to pity. But as a tribute to the other not-the-real-moms out there who may feel the same way I do on this difficult day. You are not alone in your sadness, in your regret, or in your tears. You are not the only one.
Remember the blessings today. Instead of getting stuck like I often do in what you are not. Get wrapped up in what you are. And you are a beautiful, loving, giving soul that has other gifts and purpose in this life.
Today, rejoice in where this journey has taken you, even though it is not the path you planned for yourself. Today, know that despite all your imperfections, you are perfect in God’s eyes. Today, love yourself and everything brilliant and wonderful that you are.