Willing and Able

Willing and able do not always go hand in hand. In fact, there seems to be a ginormous mysterious chasm between the two sometimes.

I’m willing to fly, but I’m not able.

I’m able to run, but I’m usually not willing to unless something is chasing me.

These things – willing and able – often exist independently on completely opposite ends of the spectrum.

I have always been more than willing to be a mother, but when it came time to make that dream a reality, I wasn’t able. Years of trying and hoping gave way to the harsh truth that it was just never gonna happen. And now the time has come to tend to my health and have the ‘seal the deal’ surgery.

Signing the consent forms at my doctors office, reading the fine print, and stating the obvious risks and outcomes tugged on my heart strings harder than I was ready for. I think it is pulling on my funny bone a bit too because, just yesterday while trying to decide what to give up for lent, I joked that I am giving up my uterus. Bad jokes aside, it is a painful situation.

The irony of my realization is that, while I am willing but not able, there are also plenty of women that have been able but are not willing. Foster children waiting for willing parents to give them forever homes are at an all time high in my community, and likely in yours too. Pregnancy is not always what makes a parent. The willingness to love and care for a child does.

If you have questions about the foster-adopt program in your community, I encourage you to reach out to the organization. The kids you would be helping are both willing and able.

Maybe we can bridge this mysterious gap in my lifetime?

Maybe this is a calling that I need to answer?

Maybe today is the day for questions instead of answers?



Today’s post was inspired by Lisa Jo Baker’s Five Minute Friday prompt, “willing”.


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8 thoughts on “Willing and Able

  1. Schotzy March 7, 2014 at 3:22 pm Reply

    Great post… I too, was willing, but not able… so praise the Lord for foreign adoption… which is where the Lord led my husband I to back in 1983…. I now have had the seal the deal surgery as well and am pretty happy to be on this side of things… an a Grannie to boot!

    • trisbendickson March 7, 2014 at 3:29 pm Reply

      Thank you for reminding me that I am not the only one that struggles with this. And how wonderful that you and your husband adopted. Hugs to you!

  2. E Wright March 7, 2014 at 3:33 pm Reply

    “Willing and able do not always go hand in hand.” So very true. Thanks for your post. Because of it, I am asking myself the question, “What are the things I am able to do but not willing to do?” Umm. Grace to you in abundance. Visiting from FMF. Esther

    • trisbendickson March 7, 2014 at 3:35 pm Reply

      Thank you for visiting Esther 🙂 Blessings to you!

  3. Tonia Bendickson March 7, 2014 at 4:00 pm Reply

    I love you. “Giving up my uterus for lent.” 😭 You’re so thoughtful, funny, inspirational, amazing.

    • trisbendickson March 7, 2014 at 4:02 pm Reply

      I love you too 🙂 Blessed by your support and encouragement and grace.

  4. sarahssundry March 7, 2014 at 6:23 pm Reply

    What a beautiful and honest post! Thank you for sharing such a personal piece of your life with us. What an wonderful post in response to the prompt. Thank you for the reminder that willing and able don’t always go hand in hand. Sometimes I need to cut myself some slack and remember that. Blessings FMF sister. 🙂 ~Sarah

    • trisbendickson March 7, 2014 at 11:13 pm Reply

      Thank you Sarah 🙂 It is funny how the timing of the prompts seems to always coincide with things I am dealing with. And what a blessing it is to write cathartically amidst such lovely friends who will welcome my words warmly. There is healing in that.

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